It can be an exciting time to have your child head to college. We’re not going to suggest so because it could help your child have a better future or secure a better job, or that it will let them earn more. But rather, because it shows your child is interested in a subject, cares about their future, and is interested to mature and become a more rounded adult, You don’t have to go to college for these things of course, but it’s nice to see our loved ones making a commitment and doing so with a sense of personal responsibility.
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As such, just in the same way you might help them look for driving instructors or head to empty parking lots to practice their driving, it can be nice to help them figure out a path forward through college. It takes a fair amount of planning, choice-making, and financial preparation to make this process worthwhile, after all.
So, with that in mind, you may wish to consider some of the following advice going forward:
Help Them Figure Out What They Want (Even If It Changes Later)
Now, if you’ve been to college you know that it’s not always common for people to 100% know what they want to do from day one. Some do. But it’s also perfectly normal to have no idea or to change your mind halfway through, because you’re not locked into the first idea you ever had, and they’re not either.
What helps is just talking it through and asking them what interests them. What kind of job they don’t want to do could be a good start if they’re having trouble. For instance, you might talk about the jobs most likely given from a specific degree. Criminology is likely going to align with some form of criminal justice of course..
Then you could talk about the lifestyle, such as whether they want to live at home or move away. A lot of these answers might be vague or change depending on the day, but that’s fine as long as the thoughts are narrowing things down a little bit.
Support Them Through Applications
The college application process can actually be quite distressing, like applying for jobs but with the implications for your entire future. You have to write large essays about how you’re sustainable, sometimes even pass tests, or go for in-person interviews. It’s a lot. So just being there to help double-check things, proofread essays, or sit down with a planner and map out the timeline can take a load off their shoulders. They might not need this, but suggesting you could help will be appreciated.
Just try not to take over completely of course, because it’s easy to slip into project manager mode when you just want them to succeed, but it’s still their path. If they don’t get in, at least they sincerely attempted. Give them ownership of the process, even if you’re quietly helping them with the little things. Even making them a nice coffee as they type up their personal statement is a lovely gesture..
Get Into The Boring Financial Stuff Early
Now, funds are hardly the most exciting topic of conversation, but it’s obviously very important. That’s because like with any expense, there are many ways to fund it. You need to determine if your child is relying on savings, scholarships, grants, loans, or a mix of everything, as knowing what’s going on money-wise is half the battle. Have open talks about what you’re able or willing to contribute (it’s okay if you can’t, don’t worry), and be clear on what things cost, not in a scary way, but just so there are no surprises later.
This is also the time to look into what kinds of aid or support are out there, which can be better than you think. Some students apply for student loans with a cosigner if they need help qualifying for better rates or just making sure they have enough to cover tuition. It’s worth researching together and asking questions, especially if you’re thinking of helping with that part.
Visit Campuses And Compare Options Together
Going to see a few campuses in person can really assist the way your child thinks about which option they’re most partial to. Suddenly, it’s not just a prospectus or a website they’re considering but a real place with people walking around, buildings to see that might serve as their own lecture halls, and a general feel to how welcoming the place is. The college may be in a town, city or state you’ve never been to after all. Maybe they immediately figure out that the course they were thinking of is in a college that prioritizes sport above all, and they’re not so into that atmosphere.
Funnily enough, even if they’re planning to stay local or study online, a visit or tour can help them picture what life will be like. Also, as a parent, it’s reassuring to know the university is run well and they take care of the surroundings nearby.
Let Them Lead The Way, Even If It’s Not Your First Choice
Ultimately, this is all their decision. Maybe they’re picking a subject you don’t understand, but that’s okay, it’s their choice. Or perhaps they’ve picked a college you wouldn’t have chosen for them. That can be tough, especially if you’re trying to help them avoid mistakes or wasted time.
But unless there’s something genuinely concerning going on, try to back their decisions because while you can guide them or have them rethink a decision to make sure they really want it, sometimes we have to let people figure things out on their own, even if the road gets a little bumpy. That’s where a lot of the real growth happens, anyway. And what is college for if not growth?
With this advice, we hope you can more easily support your child’s college decisions and planning. Thankfully, this process is also quite fun!
This is a contributed post.
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